Hey weekend!  We have a busy one over here as we are prepping for my eldest’s fourth birthday party tomorrow.  It’s the first “non-family” party – which really means we now get to have two parties.  One for kids (1:00-3:00) and then one for family (please come for dinner at 6:30).

But don’t worry!  Despite my sudden penchant for event planning, we still had time for some levity up in ‘dis joint.

Top Five Laughs of the Week

Number Five

• Me and the girls went to Hog’s Back last Sunday – which for those non-locals is basically a big patch of green space with a stunning waterfall in the middle of it and a number of paths surrounding it right in the middle of Ottawa.  We were getting ready to leave and passed a son playing soccer with his dad.  My youngest was mesmerized.  My three-year-old?  Not so much.  Soccer? Been there; done that; no interest.  We DANCE! now.  Thank. You. Very. Much.  So as we’re passing and I’m busy dragging my 15-month-old away from the action, my three-year-old asks what they are doing.  I reply that they are playing soccer.  Didn’t she remember soccer?  Yes, she replied.  Figuring this was worth a re-visit, I asked, “Do you like soccer?”  She replied: “No, I liked sitting at the picnic tables.”  So my child.  I have visions of her 20 years from now: Q: “Hey, we have a corporate softball league and are short girls, do you like softball?” A: “No.”  Q: “We all go for beer afterwards, does that make a difference?” A: “Okay, I’ll play softball.”

Number Four

• A little while ago I broke down and finally bought a salad spinner.  It’s one of those things I’d always meant to get but that never made it to the top of the list (I know.  Shocking).  Anyway, I purchase it from a kitchen store and there are a number of spinners to select from and I go one up from the basic.  It has a little lock and pump rather than a twirler.  All very fancy.  I say as much to the cashier as I’m paying and she replies, with complete seriousness: “Well, dear, sometimes you just have to treat yourself!  You deserve it!”  Yup.  That’s right.  Whenever I have a rough day at the office and need to treat myself, I like to come home, put my feet up, and spin me some salad! It’s become a bit of a standing joke here with my husband trying to get the quip in before me whenever we are making salad.  “Ah! There’s my wife treating herself again!  Only the best for you honey!  After a hard days work, you deserve it!”

Number Three

• We go for dinner every Sunday at my parents’ house.  After dinner, it’s become a bit of a tradition for my dad to take my two girls downstairs to his NEWLY RENOVATED HOME THEATRE room to watch TV.  So they sit on reclining chairs, or by the faux fireplace, while watching Ice Age, or Care Bears, or whatever, on the big screen.  Anyway – this has become the highlight of Sunday night dinner for my 15-month-old.  In that, we arrive at my parents’ house, she makes a beeline to the top of the basement stairs, starts pointing and babbling, and when we don’t immediately open the door and let her down, she starts howling.  It generally takes a few minutes of distraction and reminders that we “eat first” before she calms down.  This generally repeats a few times throughout the evening before they finally head down.  I swear, for some kids it’s Disneyworld.  For mine?  Apparently my parents’ basement is the happiest place on earth!

Number Two

• My brother and his wife took my eldest to see Smurfs 2 recently and so she has fallen in love with the Smurfs – and specifically all things Smurfette.  She came home and rummaged through her toy box for a long ignored stuffed Smurfette she’d gotten as a present when she was one.  She discovered that THERE WAS ANOTHER SMURF MOVIE on Netflix and we watched it OVER AND OVER AND OVER again.  And she discovered I own a Smurf mug.  I’ve had it since I was about five, and so am rather attached to it and slightly worried it might come to harm in the … throws of her exuberant enthusiasm.  But then she realized Smurfette wasn’t on the mug, and pretty much lost interest.  But first, she demanded to know why Smurfette – the apparently awesomest Smurf ever – was not on my mug.  At a loss for a good reason, and given the time of year at school, I told her that Smurfette had been sick on picture day and missed the photo.  She seemed to buy it.

Number One

• We’re leaving dinner at my parents’ house and for some reason they decide to spontaneously break into Elvis Presley’s Blue Suede Shoes.  My family doesn’t usually channel the cast of Glee, so this is a little odd in and of itself.  Anyway, my folks are trying to teach my daughter the words: One for the money; two for the show; three to get ready now go cat go!  She is doing great, save for the fact she keeps crooning out “One for the Mommy!”  Thanks sweetie!  Just remember me when you thank the Academy.  As for me, I don’t think I’m ever going to hear the song the right way again.  It’ll go down in history for me with that other great hit from CCR about how there’s a bathroom on the right.  Anyway – I leave you with some Elvis.  You know, for the mommies…