So after a nice break for the holidays, I’m back linking up this week with the lovely Jen Kehl (apparently my #2 Tweep last year according to Twitter) for her weekly Twisted Mixed Tape Tuesday Hop. This week’s theme:

As everyone is looking forward to a New Year and talking about resolutions, this week’s them will be Past Mistakes (not necessarily love related)

Please check out all the other misguided souls here:

All right!  So, like Sinatra says: Regrets?  I’ve had a few; but mostly?  I see my cup half full.  Life, to date, has been mostly good.  I appreciate it. But don’t worry!  I want to play.  So here’s my collection of “almosts”, “please nos” and “wish I’d figured that out sooners”.

My Favourite Mistake – Sheryl Crow

So my mamma once upon a time told me I should date lots of people to figure out who I don’t want to marry.  You know, to figure out those “deal breaker” characteristics.  That shit you really can’t live with until death do you part.

Sound advice.  Which I happily followed from my late teens through to mid 20s.  I think about that advice whenever I hear this song.

And to quote Forrest Gump?  That’s all I have to say about that!

Sunday Morning After – Amanda Marshall

So while I’ve never had one of those “Baby, who the hell are you?” moments, I’ve had many a “Let’s Giver!” evening in my younger years that could have ended badly without some remnants of good judgement, good luck, good friends, or kind strangers/acquaintances to get me home safely.  I realize, looking back, sometimes that confluence of good fortune doesn’t happen and there are a few times things could easily have ended otherwise for me.  I’m so very thankful the worst it ever ended in was a hangover.

As far as Amanda goes?  For the record, I think she does this sentiment better than Katy Perry – although I really love the Last Friday Night video too (she kinda won me over with Hanson and Michael Bolton playing the party and Debbie Gibson and Corey Feldman being her parents).

Marilyn – Dan Bern

Okay, I feel like I’ve been waiting forever for an excuse to share a Dan Bern song on this hop.  And here it is!  This one is straight up whimsical.  Premise?  If Marilyn Monroe married Henry Miller rather than Arthur Miller, as some of the Internet continues to incorrectly post.  I love this song for all the “what if” fun possibilities. I’ve loved and read about Marilyn off and on since I was a teenager and, I think if Marilyn could come back and have a “do over” she’d undo some of her “mistakes” and change it up.

Good Girl – KellyLee Evans

So I actually had the opportunity to hear KellyLee perform this song at a Carleton University Alumni event (because she’s alum – Go Ravens!) a few years ago.  It was one of those dinners where, after the keynote, they bring on the jazz band and everyone attentively listens, usually vaguely wondering if it would be rude to go to the bathroom.  But she – really – was amazing.  I was hooked and each of us got a copy of her CD – The Good Girl.  It was nice and jazzy and became background music at many a dinner we hosted.

This song resonated.  I get it.  I’ve spent much of my life being a “good girl”.  Was it a mistake?  Not a clue! It certainly didn’t feel wrong when I deviated from script.  Welcome to the grey zone of womanhood! As a mom?  I doubly get it.  I’ve read the feminist literature.  So every time I’m about to tell one of my daughters to behave and “be a good girl” I try to stop myself from uttering that horribly overused phrase.  Yes. I want my daughters to behave and be respectful.  But I don’t want them to be passive, pleasing and compliant – which is much of what the term implies.  I want them to learn that in order to be true to themselves, or reach their goals, they might have to ruffle some feathers once in a while.  I don’t want them to make the mistake of believing it’s better to please others – to be a good girl – than to go after what you want.

So that brings us to my final choice of the evening.  For this I bring you back to one of my favourite albums from my university years: Meredith Brooks’ Blurring the Edges. Best known for the single Bitch, I was going to give you “It Don’t Get Better (Than this)” but, upon reflection, I’m giving you this:

Pollyanne – Meredith Brooks

It resonated in my twenties.  It resonates now.  You don’t have to shout to be heard (who said “dark” is “deep”).  It’s about “using your words” and not mistaking being mad and stomping about for taking action. A valuable life skill to learn.  If that makes me Pollyanne, I’ll live.  Likely, quite happily.

Sentimental me.

Until next time!