I’d like to preface this post by saying that if my youngest hadn’t broken my first Mommy Sippy Cup; and my husband hadn’t broken my second; I’d be enjoying wine right now out of one of these puppies:
But I’m not.
May they both rest in piece(s).
Don’t worry, though. Ikea wine glasses still do the job.
Today was Family Day here in Ontario, Canada. For those uninitiated, it’s a statutory holiday occurring in certain Canadian provinces on a Monday in February. Family Day in Ontario was brought to us courtesy of a 2007 McGuinty promise, that if re-elected, he’d give the province a much-needed day off in February to spend with loved ones.
The first Family Day was observed here on Feb. 18, 2008.
If you work for a federal employer like, say the Federal Public Service, you don’t get it off.
My husband and I are both federal employees.
Given our kids are both in provincially run schools and daycares, one of us had to stay home.
My husbands’ leave renews with the calendar year, while mine renews with the fiscal (April 1), so he had a full bank and his boss let him take a family day (one of five) for Family Day. So he spent the day home with the kids while I went to work.
In glass half full-land, it was a really quiet drive in.
But work-life went a bit chaotic circa 9:30 and then went non-stop until shortly after 6:00.
Combine hard deadlines with half the department being off for Family Day and it was … a fun day.
Then I left after 6:00 and thought to grocery shop on the way home because husband had kids, so I wouldn’t have to bring them with me but ….
…. everything’s closed for Family Day.
So there goes gym plans tomorrow night.
Because we need to eat.
But I’ll have two preschoolers to “help” with the shopping.
Which, after a full day of school and daycare on their part, and a full day’s work on my part, should go swimmingly.
Thank you Family Day.
But getting back to today, once I got home I was greeted at the door shortly after 7:00 by my two-year-old with a load in her shorts; and a husband happy to pass the torch.
Then my eldest pleaded illness to try to get out of school tomorrow, while we simultaneously prepped for show and tell.
B is going to be for Barbie, in case anyone wanted to know.
And baton – as in TWIRLY!!
Then both girls fought over who I got to put to bed.
We rotate nights and tonight was my turn with my eldest.
My youngest turned on the waterworks.
My eldest held her ground. Dammit.
My youngest attached herself to my leg and wailed like the world would end if I didn’t read Baby Beluga, The Bunny Rabbit Show and Little Miss Austen (1 English Village; 2 Rich Gentlemen; 3 Houses; 4 Marriage Proposals; 5 Sisters … seriously, it’s teaching my two-year-old how to count and is über cute, but my husband could TOTALLY pull it off too! … 6 Horses; 7 Soldiers in Uniform; 8 Musicians; 9 Fancy Ball Gowns; 10,000 Pounds a Year. Sweet Dreams!)
My husband started laughing, but looked a bit awkward about the whole thing.
Which made me feel loved; and missed; and bad for my husband who had been there and “on” all day; and guilty for not being more present.
Is the overreaction because I work?
And that’s the rub.
Maybe I need to be more there.
And life happens in real-time and I’ve got one kick at doing my best for me and mine.
Tonight’s resolution was that I put our eldest to bed, complete with reading of The Little Mermaid, and then, after my husband had Baby Beluga’d and Bunny Rabbit Showed with the youngest, I swooped in and “Austened Out”.
Which, in my two-year-old’s world is apparently sort of equivalent to this:
So today, WordPress asked:
If you could clone yourself, how would you split up your responsibilities?
I think they’ve done movies about this from working parent perspective so I’m not sure I have much to add, but since you asked …
I’d split work me and home me.
Work me would pursue career, free from daycare pick-up and need for (what I increasingly believe is fictitious) balance. Work me would smoothly network as required. She’d be able to suggest cool restaurants and after-hour clubs. She’d totally know the band. And be on top of personal upkeep stuff like re-dying and cutting her hair and pedicures. She’d remember your name. She’d also run marathons in her spare time. You know. For personal fulfillment. Keeping trim is just a nice extra! Totally wasn’t trying!
Home me would hang with my girls, get glasses fixed before my eldest basically couldn’t see through the scratches anymore (note: not covered by plan or warranty), strategically and creatively use “busy bags” (see: way too many posts on Pinterest) to help my children “achieve their potential” without “doing it for them”, go to the gym more and cook proper meals and so be 15 lbs thinner (kind of like mat-leave me, who I really liked), take youngest to play-group, spend hours doing the extra’s required so our eldest is “caught up in senior kindergarten” (spend a moment with me in the insanity of that statement). Home me would figure out the sewing machine and what the heck fondants are for in cake decorating (because I really enjoyed my Wilton Level 1 Class). She’d volunteer for school functions and join the PTA. You know. For personal fulfillment. Connecting with other moms is just a nice extra! Totally wasn’t trying!
Both these people would individually have time to nurture personal relationships – like, say, marriage – and being able to truly do both work and home front via cloning they would feel like they’d lived up to the ridiculous bar set for women everywhere.
There would be much celebration and dancing in the streets for this woman:
I encourage you to listen to this montage to this song in order to best identify with the author.
Yeah. It was a day. And yay bunnies. The Boynton Bunny Rabbit Show free download is available here.
And for what it’s worth? I still think I’m one life hack away from figuring it all out.
What about you? If you could clone yourself, how would you split your responsibilities?