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…is I didn’t appreciate it when I had it.
Truth be told?
There were times I snickered about it.
The bureaucracy of it was … so very … well, everything about office life in the Public Service that people joke about.
First?
It was formal and coordinated by the Director’s Assistant (who didn’t drink coffee).
Second?
It was very structured.
You had to officially sign up.
There was a posted – and circulated by email – coffee purchase schedule.

I had “pretend I’m ATIP and blank out names” fun again here! This was the last schedule posted in our kitchen before I left the job…
Coffee was generally brewed every morning by 8:15am and usually again mid-afternoon.
Polite email notices were sent out prior to afternoon brews to advise of forthcoming coffee-topia.
Every month you had to contribute $5.00 to the milk, cream and sugar fund.
Regardless of whether of not you put any of that in your coffee (which I don’t).
But all good.
Team Player.
We were also certain to extend the coffee club invitation to all the poor coffee lovers two floors down who were not allowed to brew coffee on their floor due to a co-worker with a coffee odor aversion.
When our coffee commuters registered concerns about having to come up two floors in the morning only to find the coffee not yet brewed, we tried to action accordingly.
Because we were about inclusion of all coffee lovers.
So long as you don’t drink Maxwell House.
Because, as it was clearly pointed out to me prior to my membership being accepted, we weren’t THAT kind of coffee club.
As I understand it, historically, it was strictly a Bridgehead Coffee club.
Until it was pointed out that some people in the club lived nowhere near a Bridgehead, posing challenges and inconvenience for purchase.
Concessions were then made to welcome Starbucks Coffee.
Following a visit to a Fair Trade Christmas Craft Fair, I also once brought a Ten Thousand Villages blend to good reviews.

Coffee Nirvana
But, as a colleague learnt from experience, flavoured coffee was strictly verboten.
He accidentally once bought maple flavoured coffee and subsequently circulated and personally apologized to all members of the club for the error of his mistake.
Apparently our Canadian pride – at least in coffee club – does not extend to maple flavouring. Thank. You. Very. Much.
Being late for your scheduled purchase was also not tolerated.
Email reminders that your purchase date was coming would start to arrive a few days prior, had you not been considerate enough to purchase and deliver in advance.
If you didn’t deliver on your due date, you were clearly informed of your delinquency by the coordinator.
It came to be that if I had forgotten to purchase coffee the night prior to my due date I would choose being late for work over arriving WITHOUT coffee.
Because if you did, a subsequent email would generally be sent out to the group, forlornly asking if ANYONE would mind bringing coffee in ahead of schedule so that the WHOLE CLUB won’t go without because of the actions – or lack thereof – of one member who we won’t name (but you can check the schedule).
Office coffee club was coordinated with an administrative oversight function only capable in an organization that professionally does bureaucracy.
But it worked.
I remember when I left my job thinking I would enjoy the FREEDOM from coffee club.
And I did, for a few days.
Until I remembered how much money you can blow on coffee.
No one makes coffee at my new office.
So after a week I went out and bought some filters and a bag of coffee.
I dusted off and thoroughly cleaned one of the three neglected coffee machines in the kitchen and brewed a pot.
It came out a bit burnt.
Two days in a row.
I’m not sure if it’s from lack of pot use, or how much coffee I used, or what.
I mean, I’ve made coffee before. So I’m not sure what the issue is.
I’m gonna give it two more days before I try a second machine.
I’d invite others to join me, but I’m not yet confident in the quality of my coffee.
One of my new coworkers came in as I was cleaning the pot and commented that they use to make coffee, like, four years ago, but then stopped.
I asked why.
He shrugged. “You need someone to coordinate it.”
I miss coffee club.
Not enough coffee love above for you? Check out my Coffee Pinterest Board. It’s just a small obsession…
Brilliant. True. Spot on.
This coffee club was a weekly discussion (read – I had to listen to the CCC – coffee club coordinator blast those who weren’t participating). And I’d had the nerve to have a Kurig which people could use at any time, for free. Without coordination.
I don’t know…buying support, buying friends, sticking it to the man?!?
I had a love/hate relationship with the coffee club…er the bureaucracy of the coffee club.
Thanks for the smile and trip down memory lane.
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Kurig in my office isn’t an option as we can’t have coffee machines outside of the kitchen 😦
I once worked in an office that just bulk bought coffee for anyone who wanted it and there was shared responsibility for brewing it (ie: if you are first in, just do it) – end of story. That was lovely and I miss it dearly.
This was my first experience with anything so coordinated – but in it’s absence, I get the appeal.
Glad I made you smile 🙂
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As it happens, I’m smack in the middle of a huge project at work that is driven largely by cofee (and tasty breakfast treats). I’ve found a couple of people who are completely mad about coffee and hospitality, and they’re on fire for this project. I certainly hope it doesn’t end up being the totalitarian regime you describe… 🙂
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Tasty breakfast treats are dangerous! Another reason I aim to avoid purchasing coffee in cafés – ooh the temptation!
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This is totally awesome…. bureaucracy gone bonkers! I was in a department briefly where members handed out gold stars to each other for small perceived favors. Stickies were posted on a board against your name. At the end of the month was a formal award presentation for the one with the most.
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There was many a time I thought it went a bit too far. I mean, we should be able to coordinate brewing coffee as a group without establishing Terms of Reference. I have a similar aversion to friends who feel the need to over coordinate every outing. I guess it comes down to me thinking there are things that we should just civilly and informally be able to figure out. But again, when we all followed the rules it worked seamlessly, so there’s something to be said for that… I must admit, I’m holding out hope that I figure out a good machine at my new office and just happily brew away on my own for a bit.
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Mr Coffee used to work for me. Moved up to a Cuisinart with an insulated pot. We now own a Saeco espresso machine that grinds and brews, a Bialetti percolator and a french press.
I’m not the world’s most organized and conscientious person… I would be kicked out a club like that!
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Certainly not for everyone. A few left … I love my home coffee machine, and can brew just fine in that (and most others I’ve ever used) so I’m gonna figure this out!
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I can’t decide if this is communist, fascist or socialist. Either way, my office is lousy with Keurig machines, which mean nothing to me. I sneak Coke Zero into my coffee cup each day.
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I think Keurig machines might solve much of this.
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Those cups cost a gold brick a box, though.
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Very true!
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I worked with a guy who kept a coffee pot on his desk – brilliant, and lasted less than two weeks before the pinheads in management put the kibosh on it.
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lol, LOVE this and can totally relate. My entire office is depends on coffee as though it were the life line. While we do not have a “club” we do make sure the coffee is stocked. I do not drink the coffee because the brand they choose taste like dirt but from time to time will make a fresh pot. While I am making my own little cup of heaven using a Via or reheating what I brought from home.
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Ah – I suspect you would have fit in well in our “no flavoured coffee; no Maxwell House” club 😉 I must admit to not really being too picky about my type of coffee – the main thing is that it’s available. End of discussion.
Glad you liked it!
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I love this! So true…so true. I work at home, now, and my coffee club consists of my Hub making the BEST coffee on the planet. I get to drink it in my yoga pants while the cats help me work. No due dates, no bureaucracy. 😀
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Now THAT sounds like a winning system! My husband brews and brings me coffee while I’m reading on the couch sometimes on the weekend which is pretty awesome – but your set-up sounds blissful.
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Hilarious. 😀 Great post. *hands you a non-maple coffee*
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*gratefully accepts non-maple coffee* – That’s good stuff- thx.
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Good one. Organized coffee does kinda takes the fun out of coffee…
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I can’t imagine people working in an office where many cups of coffee are brewed every day and using Keurig? Think about the plastic waste.
My problem with coffee is that I only drink a couple of cups each week, if that. It makes me subsidize other, more avid coffee drinkers.
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